Telling ghost stories has never gone out of style. Passed on to new generations the game stays the same. Teenaged boys take teenaged girls to places creepy enough to scare them. The boys up the stakes by telling scary ghost stories. The girls draw closer to the boys to feel protected. This is one of those stories. Devils Tea Table is the scariest place to do it. It exists about thirty minuets drive North of Trenton New Jersey just off the side of Route 29 North. The South side of the road borders the Delaware River. I have been there several times. I have parked off to the side of the road beneath the rock faces and then made the short climb up the rock trails to get up to Devils Tea Top. You know you are there as soon as you see it. In a flat area about one hundred feet high above the road there is a rocky clearing. Near the center of the clearing you see a long thin single outcrop of rock jutting skyward. It rises over twenty feet. It is capped with an almost perfectly circular flat rock over ten feet in radius. It is most out of place. The formation is so unusual that it is famous. It honestly does look like a rock tea table. The flat area it is set in has no other unusual features. It is just a very large flat solid rock clearing scrubbed around the perimeters with dry looking green and brown bushes. The rock faces around the clearing rise high above and over the Tea Table on three sides. There are no trails leading up above into the rocky cliffs overseeing the Devils Tea Table. You can't climb above to see what the top of the Tea Table looks like. This adds to the spooky mystique. The clearing feels like it is there just to be the staging area for the presentation of the Tea Table. It is worth seeing, and it is understandable why it has its name. On this night just after dusk in late October four teenagers sat beneath the Devils Tea Table to repeat a long held tradition.
Jay Kelsey was the leader of the group. He had driven the four to the creepy destination with the intention of making Gina Longolo his girl. Gina invited her friend Maria Gianni because they were friends who went most places together. Frank Lewis was happy to go along as a knowing pawn in Jay's plan hoping to score with Gina. Jay began telling a most famous story from that area. It was about a second very unusual place nearby. It is called Gravity Hill. Gravity Hill is also an actual place I have been to more than once. It is only about a fifteen minuet ride from Devils Tea Table.
"After we leave here we're going to go to Gravity Hill. Before we do I have some good news, and some bad news. The good news is that we won't get out of the car when we get there. We're going to drive up a hill, Gravity Hill, and while we are going up hill I'm going to stop the car. You can see that we are driving up hill. I'm going to put my foot on the brake and put the car in neutral. Then you are going to watch me take my foot off the brake. Here is the weird part. The car is going to roll uphill. You've never seen anything like it. What do you think of that?"
With the dusk starting to settle to darkness a sudden cool breeze seemed to punctuate Jay's question. Gina moved close enough for Jay to put his arm around her. She was a little spooked.
" That does sound weird. I think if that happened I would be scared."
Frank wanted to put his arm around Maria, but she was keeping her distance. He awkwardly reached for her while speaking.
"What about you. Would you be scared too?"
Maria casually pushed Frank's arm away from her.
"Not only not scary, but it's not going to happen. Gravity is gravity and maybe it is some kind of trick."
She looked at Gina and rolled her eyes. Gina rolled her eyes back at Maria, but moved a little closer to Jay. It was unspoken but obvious that Maria was standing off Frank, but that Gina liked Jay. All four picked up on it and Frank wasn't pleased. He snapped at Jay.
"Yeah, so what's the bad news Jay?"
Jay shot a look at Frank that said chill out and don't blow this for me. He answered, but directly to Gina.
"The bad news is why the car goes uphill. I was told that a long time ago there was a witch who lived in a house near the top of the hill. When she put a curse on one of her neighbors their baby died. The people who lived around there got together one night and went to the witches house. They broke in and beat her. They dragged her out of the house and took her out to a tree at the top of the hill. They hung her! As she was dying she put a curse on all of them. The curse got them one by one. Terrible things happened to them all. Nobody ever lived up around there again."
Gina put a full hug on Jay.
"Woah, now that is scary. I'm afraid of witches and black magic."
Frank had heard the story before and knew that Jay was about to tell the end of the story and that it was the scariest part. He made an even more awkward grab at Maria while he spoke.
"Yeah, is that it?"
Maria wasn't shy. She pushed Frank away hard and stared him down. Jay shook his head at Frank. He answered to Gina again.
"No, that's not all. They say that if you see the witch hanging in the tree at the top of the hill you will die that night!"
Gina was totally into the story. She gasped.
"That's it Jay! What did you tell me that for? I'm not going there!"
Jay smiled. He hugged Gina tighter.
"Don't worry Gina, I'll protect you."
Frank looked at the two of them and then at Maria. He just frowned at her.
"It's almost dark. Let's get out of here."
He stood up to leave. Jay and Gina got up too. They clung together. Maria got up and took a step back toward the outcrop above them.
"Nice story Jay. Your buddy Frank here creeps me out more than your fake witch story. You can all just head down the hill and I'll be right behind you."
She pointed at Frank then at the trail down the hill.
"Go on Mr. horndog!"
Frank put his hands out palms up.
"What? Fine, you got it."
He walked down toward the trail head.
Gina was wrapped around Jay. They were all standing. She looked at Maria a little harshly.
"Come on Maria, he's not that bad!"
Maria's mouth dropped open as she crossed her arms and stepped back. Gina shook her head.
"Fine! Whatever Ria!"
She and Jay moved toward the pathway down leaving Maria standing there fuming. Maria watched Jay and her friend disappear down into the rocky trail. She was upset and didn't notice what was happening above her. A perfect noose was lowering closer and closer to her head. Before she realized it was around her neck. She kicked and fought as she was pulled up and dragged along the rock face. Her voice was cut off from the tightening noose. She fought hard but was still yanked quickly up more than fifty feet. She was near death as she was pulled into the small cave above the Devils Tea Table. Her friends waited a while before heading back up the hill to get her. She was gone. To them she just vanished. Up above them she was seeing the last thing she ever would. Lurking on top of her was the creepy bearded man with evil insanity in his eyes. Behind and above him on the ceiling of the small cave she saw the last written words she would ever see. She was going into shock. Clearly scribed in green glow in the dark paint she read the large letters that spelled out the words.
DARK ANGEL PERCH
